*Gasp* Another movie list?
You bet your sweet ass it’s another movie list! This time for my most anticipated movies of 2015.If you thought last year was a good year for film, then 2015 is looking like a great year for film.
Buzzfeed, take this as an application to work for you and write lists of things. Like, “Top 15 Gifs of Tom Hardy with Puppies” or “Top 10 Ways to Find Out if M Night Shyamalan is Secretly Your Grandma.”
I will be waiting at my computer for your response.
Is…is that Tom Hardy and…Tom Hardy? Yes, yes it is. Legend is the story of two twin British gangsters who terrorize London around the 50’s and 60’s. If the thought of two Hardys in one movie gets you hard, then I totally won’t judge you, but that’s still a bit weird. The fact that we get double the Hardy is enough to put this on the list. Now if only they had called it the Hardy Boys. Missed opportunity there.
Sicario is Denis Villeneuve’s (Prisoners, Enemy) next flim, about a female FBI agent that joins a CIA operation to take down a cartel boss. Starring Josh Brolin, Emily Blunt, and Benicio Del Toro, not much has been released about the movie, but if it’s anywhere near as good as Villeneuve’s previous films, then Sicario is looking to be one of the best thrillers of the year.
8. Jurassic World
This is one of my, “Oh God, please don’t be shitty” choices on this list. I love Jurassic Park, and even slightly enjoyed its much more stupid sequels. Though the trailer has got me feeling a little unsure if the movies going to be any good or not. Chris Pratt looks super serious, the dialogue seems pretty cliched, and the plot revolves around the scientists doing something stupid…again. Despite all that I will definitely see it, and you probably will too. Because dinosaurs, man. They’re fricken cool.
7. Child 44
Child 44 is based on a book of a Soviet Union officer who investigates a series of child murders in Russia. Tom Hardy is here again because if you’ve seen some of Tom Hardy’s movies, you’ll understand why you should get excited about any movie he’s in. Gary Oldman and Noomi Rapace also star, and I’m kind of hoping it will be the Gone Girl or Prisoners of 2015.
6. The Hateful Eight
Quentin Tarantino’s new film. Need I say more? Bounty hunters in post-Civil war Wyoming seek shelter during a blizzard and there’s probably cool dialogue and a lot of violence. Hell, even Kurt Russell is in it. Unless you generally dislike Tarantino, then there’s no reason why you shouldn’t be excited.
Whenever you say, “New James Bond film.” I ask, “When can I watch it?” Spectre is the newest James Bond film in the series, and while I have no idea what it’s about really, I can’t help but be excited about it. Daniel Craig, Christoph Waltz, and Ralph Fiennes also lead a great cast. Join with me in praying for an awesome skiing scene. It could totally happen…
4. Mad Max: Fury Road
Have you ever been on the toilet and thought, “I wish I could watch a movie that was 2 hour long car chase…on acid?” I present to you Mad Max: Fury Road. A post-apocalyptic Australia that views gas as currency and has a bunch of psychopathic thugs and weirdos, the world of Mad Max is a crazy good time. If you’re thinking, “What’s Mad Max?” Then I’d like to direct you immediately to Mad Max 2: Road Warrior. You can watch Mad Max if you want, but Mad Max 2 is the balls to the walls, pedal to the medal craziness that you’ll see in this movie. It’s a hoot.
Did I mention Tom Hardy plays Max?
3. Avengers: Age of Ultron
The newest Avengers movie has the team facing off against Ultron, the robot baddie accidentally revived by Tony Stark. You probably enjoyed the hell out of the first one, so this movie’s hype is already ridiculously high. If I get a good Iron Man vs Hulk fight I’ll be happy.
2. The Revenant
“What’s The Revenant?” You ask? Oh, just a little movie starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Tom Hardy, and directed by Alejandro González Iñárritu who also directed Birdman. The Revenant is based on the true story of fur trapper Hugh Glass, who survives a bear mauling and seeks revenge on those who left him to die. If this movie isn’t good I’ll eat a shoe, or at least say I did.
1. Star Wars VII
Star Wars. #1 is Star Wars. Did you expect anything else? It looks good. The cast is good. They got the guys from The Raid 2 to do action scenes.
It’s gonna be awesome.
Please be good.
There are a lot of movies I left off the list that I’m also very excited to see, but in due time we’ll be able to tell if 2015 will be the year for movie fans everywhere.
Never mind. 2015 is looking to be the worst year for movies ever.
What are you looking forward to in 2015? Let me know by writing me an angry comment about it!