Kingsman: The Secret Service Review

Kickass + James Bond + Xmen: First Class = A proper good time mate.

There are many British phrases below. You have been warned.

Leave your sensibilities at the door.


If you ever felt your spy movies were a little too dry, if you ever desired to see Colin Firth kick tons of ass, or if you ever wanted to punch someone from the Westboro Baptist Church in the face, then this movie might be for you. Kingsman’s going to make sure you’re having a good time, whether that requires a good kick in your arse or not.

A very sexy and very painful kick in the arse

Kingmsan tells the story of a British secret service agency that trains spies to help save the world one mission at a time. Samuel L. Jackson, playing someone that isn’t himself, hatches a plan to help, “save the world” which involves killing almost everyone. In the meantime, The Kingsman are looking to replace an agent by holding a series of tests for new recruits to see if they’re worthy for the job. Eggsy (Taron Egerton) is one of those candidates, and despite his low class background he has potential to follow in his dad’s footsteps and become the next Kingsman.


Colin Firth is absolutely fantastic in this movie. If you just thought he was just some old British guy who plays sophisticated characters in all his movies well…you’re right, but he can also kick some ass and look proper fit while doing so. Though Firth seems to steal every scene he is in, Egerton does a phenomenal job as well, creating a funny and likable character that most people can relate to. Hell, we even get Michael Cain and Mark Strong in this one and you can tell everyone’s having a bloody good time with it.

colin firth
Showing Daniel Craig how it’s done

Funny, thrilling, and full of over the top action The Kingsman does everything you’d hope for, and it just might be the most fun you’ll have in a theater in 2015. It may not be the greatest movie ever, it’s hard to find many faults with it. It knows what it is, and should meet your expectations if not greatly exceed them. You’ll be havin’ a laugh by the end of it. It’s bloody brilliant. A smashing good time, really…

Okay, just one more.

It’s the tits!

Grab your fine tailored suit, put on your spectacles, don’t forget your umbrella, and make sure you have a martini in hand when you go watch Kingsman: The Secret Service.


Cheers, mate!

Overall Score: 8/10 A proper good show.

If you enjoyed this then stay tuned for the 50 Shades of Grey Review coming soon. Like and share or whatever the kids do now days. I’ll leave you all with a picture of a beautiful pug. You can thank me later.

‘ello Govna!

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